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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27336460">Some notes at the beginning of a song</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/reader2020/pseuds/reader2020'>reader2020</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hamilton - Miranda</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Domestic, F/M, Family, Fluff, Kids, Song fics, lyrics</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 23:54:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>909</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27336460</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/reader2020/pseuds/reader2020</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by “From now on” from the Greatest Showman.<br/>Alexander realises his mistakes</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alexander Hamilton/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Some notes at the beginning of a song</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Some of the lyrics aren’t in the correct order, I used the ones most fitting for the events.<br/>Enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>I felt the sun begin to dim, and felt that winter wind blow cold </strong>
</p><p>Moisture clung to the evening air like life support, thick rain drops dully illuminated by the amber glow of the street lights. Deep puddles decorated the street, the murky water looking strangely mysterious.<br/>
It was long past midnight, and, considering this was the city that never sleeps, eerily quiet.<br/>
This was the earliest Alexander had left work in a month, he tried to avoid his house whilst most of its occupants were awake.</p><p>Facing them was unbearable after the pamphlet was published. </p><p>He hurried down the street, desperate for cover from the unforgiving rain; wanting nothing more than a warm bed. </p><p>As he reached the obnoxiously blue door, happy memories pushed their way into his mind. They had decided to paint it blue way before they had even moved in, blue was Elizas favourite colour after all, and it had been a childhood dream of hers to have a bright blue door.<br/>
He shook his head in an attempt to rid himself of the guilt that the memory had brought. Pulling his keys quickly out of his pocket, he pushed the door open and stepped inside. </p><p>For a house containing 5 children, it was silent as it ever had been. The past days activities were still evident, the finger paintings sat drying by the fireplace, muddy trainers dumped in a pile by the staircase. Alexander sighed deeply, and placed the shoes carefully on the shoe rack, knowing it would save Eliza a job in the morning.</p><p>Even though he had caused a rift in the family, he could still be a helpful father.</p><p>
  <strong> A man who learns who is there for him, when the glitter fades and the walls won’t hold </strong>
</p><p>Continuing into the kitchen, he hung his bag on the back of a chair, knowing that he would be gone before anyone could complain about it once they were awake. He slumped down into the chair, closing his eyes and rubbing his temples in a vain attempt to ease his permanent headache. Sighing again, he looked around the house.<br/>
As clean as Eliza kept it, it was obvious that many children lived there. A big bookshelf containing more picture books than actual books was pressed against the wall, a neatly written height chart on one side of it. Drawings cluttered the fridge, along with a carefully planned timetable of clubs, piano performances and french assessments, showing the busy life than came with so many little ones.<br/>
This all sparked guilt within Alexander, a feeling he had grown accustomed to recently.</p><p>
  <strong>If all was lost, is more I gain, cause it led me back to you </strong>
</p><p>The thing that sparked the most guilt, however, was the family photo, framed and hung pride of place on the only empty wall. Seven smiles shone back at him, a reminder of the happiness he had destroyed.<br/>
And for what? He thought. His own selfish gain. Whilst he was busy ‘protecting his legacy’ he had permanently ruined his actual legacy: his wife and children. </p><p>
  <strong>The pitfalls of the man I became</strong>
</p><p>That’s when Alexander realised what the most important thing in his life truly was. Not his writing, not his financial system, his family.</p><p>Tonight, he decided, a promise within him starts that from now on, he will focus on his family. His eyes will not be blinded by the lights, not anymore. Politicians praising his name was now someone else’s dream, and he was glad of it.</p><p> “For years and years, I chased their cheers, the crazy speed of always needing more.” He suddenly said out loud, realisation of who he had become hitting him with full force.<br/>
Pushing his chair out quickly he leapt up the stairs two at a time, desperate to talk to Eliza.<br/>
Before the reality of everything had hit him, Alexander had crashed into their bedroom (currently only Eliza slept here, his office becoming his new room).<br/>
“Alexander?” Eliza stared at him, bewildered at why her husband who she wasn’t even talking to at the minute had just barged his way into her bedroom.</p><p>Instead of an explanation, he simply said “I’m done.”</p><p>“Done with what?” She questioned, her heart sinking as she realised he may be taking about their marriage.<br/>
“Done with me, the way I am, my job, everything but you and the kids.”<br/>
Eliza stared back at her husband, utterly in awe. Throughout all their marriage, the only thing she ever wanted was his full devotion. But she always had to share it with America, and she had found peace with that. He had finally come to his senses, and she could tell he truly cared. All her anger vanished, and, for the first time in along time, she felt that she had her husband back. Not the shell of a man who works far too hard, but the man she fell in love with all those years ago. The crazy, loving man she knew, deep down, he really was. </p><p>“When I see you here, I remember who all this was for.” Alexander whispered, quietly enough that she almost didn’t hear it. </p><p>“I forgive you.” She blurted, finally ending her silence. He looked at her like she had hung the moon, eyes shining with tears.<br/>
“I love you so much.” He wiped a stray tear away.</p><p>“I love you too.” She sighed. </p><p>
  <strong>And we will come back home, home again.</strong>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This will (hopefully) be part of a collection of Hamilton stories inspired by songs.<br/>Any feedback is appreciated! :)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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